The next morning I woke up to a small finger tap-tap-tapping my arm.
Mommy, he said,
Is it Mommy and Miles Day again?
No sweetie, it’s our whole family’s day today, but that sure was fun, wasn’t it?
Puppy dog eyes.
And it was. It was so good. We boarded a bus in the morning and bounced our way to St. Paul for a day at the Children’s Museum with other families from Miles’ preschool. We even got to see Uncle K for a while. When Miles ran to hug him I thought, I haven’t seen him that excited in a really long time. He misses living by Uncle K.
We explored inside the museum…always really quickly, from thing to thing to thing. I tried hard to fight the Mommy Fears, the ones that rear their ugly head and make me think of injuries and kidnapping. Seriously. Motherhood is hard on a girl’s brain, isn’t it?
And then we explored outside.
We found this way cool little building sandwiched in an alley and despite the orange cones in front of it, we explored that too.
I know, I’m teaching my child to ignore orange cones for photo opportunities. Don’t judge.
I want another Mommy and Miles Day. He is one of my favorite people.
Also, today I am 90 days sober. I don’t tell you that so you’ll praise me. I’ve got a LONG way to go on this journey, but I tell you that because I realized on Mommy and Miles Day that I wasn’t in a hurry. I wasn’t wishing to get back on the bus so I could get home to what I’d become so dependent on needing. I was just there.
I was just there.
The End.
{ 38 comments }
Go you. :)
I think I need a day to be one-on-one with each of my babies. Oh summer, come quickly. :)
Just here.
Me, too.
Love you.
Am looking forward to a day like that with my little guy tomorrow. Looks perfect, and nice to coincide with your most recent milestone. (Ooh, really bad play on words. Sorry.)
Congratulations. On being just there. And on the work required to make that so.
He's a lucky little man.
Awesome. Not praising you because I think you want people to, but praising you because you deserve to be proud of yourself and have other people proud of you too!
I am so proud of you Heather….each day is a struggle and a blessing all rolled into one. You do rock!
I suspect you deserve all the support and love you can get, so congratulations!
Also, I'm with you, those days when we can focus entirely on just one child. It makes me feel so good, so engaged! I can only imagine how it makes them feel.
Awesome Heather! :) For real, I am proud.
congrats on 90, friend.
I had a one-on-one date with my Owen a week or so ago, and it was so, so good. I'm glad you got that with Miles.
Great photos, too.
xo elizabeth
90 days. Awesome. Congratulations.
SO much good in this post. Lots and lots of good.
Thanks for the reminder to do more one on one things with my kids.
Still praying for you!
oh and Sam LOVES that boat thing at the CM. He could stay in that room ALL DAY LONG.
I want a miles day too!! well a whole family day! Looking forward to our special movie day this summer!!
way to kick butt on 90 days!!!
Reading your last few comments made me realize that I too have my own addictions, not chemical but definitely things that are SO MUCH MORE important than being in the moment with my child.
Thanks for the reality check. You're an inspiration. Keep up the good work!
Congratulations! So proud of you (regardless of the orange cones issue) :)
Cute son!
Congrats! I love that you are feeling the benefits of sobriety every day, and that you realized it while Miles is still little. :) GO YOU!
Awesome, just awesome. All of it.
you get praise anyway.
feel that too.
those pictures are seriously fabulous.
Yay! That's all.
Pat.pat.pat. (sorry, I couldn't help it.)
So glad to have found your blog! I absolutely love your tag line: I write to find out what I'm thinking. I feel that way all the time. I literally watch words fill the page and think, "Huh. Who knew?"
Congrats on 90 days. It's no small feat… and so nice, I'm sure, to get a great reminder of why you're doing it.
Can't wait to keep reading!
I love those photos at the stairwell, just gorgeous.
So happy for your day :)
And so happy for your 90 days! So much love and admiration for you.
90 days is a huge enormous thing. Congratulations.
And I love kid dates. We need to plan some for the next few weeks.
So proud of you Heather! I'm sorry I haven't been over here in a while…life is full right now.
keep loving those "mommy and kid" days….I am missing mine!
"I was just there". That's harder than it sounds! Mommy fears are terrible too. What a great post.
Oh, those pictures are amazing.
And I'm going to congratulation you on 90 days, too. It's HUGE. And what a great reward – that present feeling. No longer being a slave to that urge. That 'elsewhere' urge.
Way to go.
-Ellie
Too bad if you don't want praise: Congrats on 90 days! :) It's to be celebrated!
And I want to say that I can relate to that feeling of rushing…of wanting to be somewhere else (selfishly) intead of in the moment with our kids. I've felt it more times than I'd like to admit, and letting go and freeing yourself to enjoy the moment is very hard won. Well done!
beautiful pictures.
so jealous on sooo many levels!
I am so proud of you.
Also, thank you for reminding me that I need to have a mommy & Luke day, because I think that's part of what my life is missing.
90 days is a big-ass deal.
You did that.
Keep doing that.
xoxo
Mommy and any kid day is pretty awesome. I cherish the moments I have with my oldest when she and I are alone together.
One-on-ones with Mommy are very special, and Miles knows it. What a great and solid little family you have!
You are AWESOME Lady!!! 90 days is a big thing. I am so proud of you.
I LOOOOVE having one on one days with my kids. Last year for Father's Day I let the kids each choose a date with Dad. We bought all the things they would need for the date (candy, movie gift cert. and popcorn money from Seth and a g.c to Subway and a cert. to go to the park from Amelia) and they had so much fun with Daddy.
I try to get away with each of them a couple of times a month. I wish I could do it more often.
You know what? You're one of my favorite people on the internets. Period.
Congratulations, for today and for the past 90. You're living your life, and that's a hard and beautiful thing to do.
I'm only gonna praise you for being just there. We all crave THAT feeling. And dude, I'm sooooo glad you got that feeling on that day with that lil' dude of yours.
Yay for Mommy and Miles day.
xo
Lee
This is just beautiful. Cheers to 90 times infinity. I am proud of you.
Awesome!!!
90 Days…just awesome.
Lovely post. I don't miss the hurry up and drink demon for a second…ahh freedom!
I'm a few days late on this but I am going to praise you anyway…congrats on 90 days!
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