Pumpkin Bread

1 can pumpkin

1 cup and 2 Tbsp. sugar

1/2 cup brown sugar

4 egg whites (divided 3 and 1)

1/2 cup milk

1/4 cup canola oil

2 cups flour

2 1/2 tsp. Baking Powder

2 tsp. pumpkin pie spice

1/4 tsp. salt

1 pkg cream cheese (8 oz)

Heat oven to 350. Mix pumpkin, 1 cup sugar, brown sugar, 3 egg whites, milk and oil.

Add flour, baking powder, pie spice and salt. Stir just unitl moistened.

Filler: Beat cream cheese, 2 Tbsp sugar, and remaining egg white until blended.

Put half the pumpkin batter in loaf pan. Spoon cream cheese mixture evenly over the top and cover with the other half of the pumpkin mixture.

Bake for about one hour or until center appears done.

Sometimes I get so focused on things like wanting to make and eat pumpkin bread that I’m missing out on a lot of other things throughout the day. I keep thinking, “but I would really like to make that bread.” This reminds me of an analogy that popped up this week. I went to my parents for a few days because Ryan was out of town. I was driving from my friend Jenna’s to my parents in the dark. I am always searching the ditches around there for deer when it’s dark. I thought for sure there was a deer on the side of the road, waiting to pounce on the car, but then I realized it was just a mailbox. I sure spent too many seconds glaring at that mailbox, picturing antlers and hooves before realizing it was a harmless inanimate object. I thought then about how much I do that in life. I focus on something that is pretty pointless to focus on. All the while, what I’m looking for might just be on the other side of the road. Or maybe I even passed it a mile back without seeing it cause I was too busy focusing on something else. I guess this is an analogy for me about worrying about silly things. And about focusing on things I don’t really have to get done. Instead, I could be taking in the whole picture and making a decision about what’s best for that moment in life. If I did this more faithfully I’d probably have a lot more fun, peace and joy. So I’ll continue to work on it since it seems to be my “thing.” Someday, maybe when I’m about 50, I’ll have mastered the art of relaxing and living moment to moment. At least that’s what Oprah says – 50 is the magic “learn all your lessons” age. Go figure. I’m hoping to have matured even somewhat by that point. There’s just so much to learn and I keep finding out I’m not the best student. Sure I take in the lesson, but then I don’t really apply it all that well. I guess one of the strangely beautiful things about life is that we never do stop learning and we get to keep changing, even after 50.

Enough Heatherbabble for one day. On a lighter note, Halloween was great fun for Miles. Asher stayed in, he isn’t quite up to Trick or Treating yet. Miles had his first real Trick or Treating experience and it was such a hoot. He couldn’t believe that you could go up to someone’s house, knock, they’d hand you candy and then you just…. leave. He seemed like he thought he should stay and visit. Then he got the hang of it and seemed to think it was really quite cool. No obligations, no strings attached, just CANDY!!!! He was so cute in his little fireman outfit. His hat wouldn’t stay on and it was cold, so he wore a stocking hat. For me, that just made him all the more adorable. Then he got to spend the next couple of days hangin’ with cousin Max, his favorite person on the planet. He’s pretty worn out now.

An update on Asher: He has been making it for six hour stretches at night the last three nights in a row!!! I couldn’t be happier. Go team. I was pretty tired of getting up every 2 or 3 hours the last four months. We changed his medication for reflux and it seemed to do the trick. I won’t get into the mom guilt from not having changed this earlier…. ugh. Just as previously mentioned, live and learn!