I have a pretty common conversation with other moms. We talk about whatever struggle is currently on our plates with our kids. We talk about how tired we are. We sometimes complain a little. But I’m thankful for friends who are learning alongside me. I’m thankful that I have friends who will share their true feelings, fears, and even moments that they aren’t too proud of. As parents we are stretched in more ways than we thought possible, no matter what our situation. No matter how many children you have, or what kind of children they are; parenting is something that stretches every part of you. Just when you think you have a challenge all figured out, something changes, completely stomping all over your desire to control everything. What is this stretching? I don’t exactly know how to describe it, but I’ll give it an unworthy try;Before your baby arrives, you expect that […]
Thank you for allowing me to pop up in your inbox and for reading my words, silly or serious. I appreciate you. ~Heather
Mommy- “MILES, SIT DOWN! You cannot STAND in the tub!”Miles – “Why?”Mommy- “Because it’s very slippery and you would easily fall and hit your head or something.”Miles – “Maybe I could just wear a helmet in the bath.” Thank you for allowing me to pop up in your inbox and for reading my words, silly or serious. I appreciate you. ~Heather
Sometimes my Mama Bear instincts surprise me. It happens when Miles or Asher gets hurt and that heart-wrenching cry pierces my ears and then quickly makes the leap to my heart. I fly into defensive and protective mode. Sometimes it takes a moment for me to gather my wits and deal calmly with the situation. Poor Ryan has been at the receiving end of Mama Bear’s irrational fight response a few too many times- I’ll say something like,”WHAT were you doing?!?” As if he sat idly by, indifferent to his child’s safety. My rational mind knows that he does all he can, just as I do. But Mama Bear looks to blame someone for accidental bumps and scrapes.I’ve noticed Mama Bear is also quite protective of my children’s feelings. Even though Asher doesn’t speak English (completely) yet. I still growl if someone says something unflattering. And just like when they get hurt physically, […]
Miles (after throwing a rock) – “A man has to do that stuff.” Asher is sleeping SO much these days. I won’t go into detail, but it’s funny how we wanted him to sleep so badly and now that he sleeps a whole bunch I worry he could be sick. Maybe I’m sick.Asher is also consistently trying to say ball whenever he’s holding one and uses the same “BA” for balloon. He says mama, but mostly when he’s really mad that I’m not picking him up. Which is any time that I put him down. He’s constantly getting teeth and would prefer the comfort of our arms and who can blame him. I couldn’t even handle getting my wisdom teeth two at a time. This poor boy gets four teeth at a time (twice) and now is getting more in the back. ouch. He’s also starting to move! Oh no, don’t do it. […]
Suddenly Asher is waving, saying ball and mama, and eating a lot of what we’re eating. How did that happen? With these two “new” people around me all the time, I find one of the best parts is how that makes me look at life like they do. Sometimes Miles will ask “why” about the simplest thing that I had forgotten to pay attention to and really take in, and it’s like it’s new for me too because I have to think through how I’m going to answer him in simple terms.These are the times when I think about how tiring it must be to be 2.75 years old. To be so new to everything and learning so much every day. And so much of it seems strange! Why DO people need to sleep? Why IS the stuff on trees called BARK? That’s what a dog does! I’m sure that’s why kids go […]
True confessions of a mom who doesn’t take care of herself: Usually I completely forget to “get ready” in the morning. I feed and dress the boys (which also includes fighting with Miles about what to wear and whether or not there is butter on his waffles, while constantly throwing cheerios in Asher’s direction to try to keep the beast at bay). Then as we are about to go out the door I run to the bathroom, take a peek in the mirror and gauge how much oil is gleaming from my hair. That’s it. That’s the extent of my morning beauty routine. If said hair is especially greasy I find a way to hide that. That’s one good thing about winter; hats. Let’s just say that if I brush my teeth, apply deodorant and remember to change out of my pj’s, I feel good enough about myself to show my face to […]
This was Asher’s face the first time he saw a monkey. It was a crazy monkey. Then Asher tried to look like the monkey. And Miles said, “why does he have a butt?”This made me laugh a lot because of my previous post regarding monkeys (and their butts). Thank you for allowing me to pop up in your inbox and for reading my words, silly or serious. I appreciate you. ~Heather
Yesterday we spent time in the backyard with Uncle Kevin. Here are some photos from that adventure… Asher lasted awhile in his stroller, hanging out and holding on to his feet. Miles had a CRAZY ride in the swing.At a random moment, standing by the water table, Miles looked at Kevin and said, “I miss my daddy.” I think he must miss you more than he is able to understand or articulate because he’s acting like MONSTER Miles quite frequently. Here are some quotes:“NO, I will not stop my body!!!”“Mommy, you are hurting my feewings.” (While in time out for cracking Asher on the head)“I WILL NOT listen to your words!!!”This defiant-finding-his-own-identity thing is getting tricky. The threats have become more serious – “If you don’t start to listen, we can’t go to the zoo.” Then I suddenly realize that I will have to follow through and spend the afternoon at home and […]
It has come to my attention that I have completely snowed a few people. Some friends and acquaintances that read this blog have mentioned that they feel they aren’t doing enough as mothers, or doing it “right” when they read some of my posts. I thought something along the lines of, “holy crap, have I been making stuff up?!? How will I make it clear that I’m NO Mother of the Year!?” So, first of all, here are some pictures that might help… This is my kitchen counter. It’s hard to tell because there are so many dishes and other random things covering every bit of the surfaces. My kitchen may not always look this way, but it does a lot. In the right-hand photo, if you look close enough, you will see evidence of a trip to McDonald’s! The horror! See? I’m not all organic all the time, no way! Also, please […]
I read once that the mind is like a tree and our thoughts are the branches. Our train of thought moving from thing to thing is like monkeys swinging from branch to branch. A monkey moves to a new branch, our topic becomes new. You get the idea. I love it when I can actually watch this happen with another person. Especially someone who, like me, has absolutely no control over the monkeys. My monkeys are completely nuts. They are so busy and so fast that I can rarely keep up. Sometimes I just want to tell them to take a nap. They hardly even rest at night! I swear they’re on something, or maybe getting too much natural sugar from all the bananas. I don’t know. Sometimes I just want new monkeys even though I’ve grown to love mine. I’m very familiar with them. Even though some of them aren’t that nice. […]
Thank you for allowing me to pop up in your inbox and for reading my words, silly or serious. I appreciate you. ~Heather
While I’m still working on getting things back to normal on the blog, I’m finding I too like the blue. It’s like the sky. Or how I hope the sky will be most of the time this Spring. Although rain isn’t terrible. Just ask Miles, “it goes in the dirt and makes the flowers grow.” Point taken.My mom is here for a visit and just cut Miles’ hair. He thought that was not the best idea at first, but now that it’s cut he says it’s beautiful.Asher had his nine month appointment on Thursday. He isn’t quite as hefty as we assumed, falling in the 57th percentile for weight. He was 50 something for height too, and that noggin of his fell once again in the 99th! We also discussed pooping at length. It’s so weird how normal it is to talk with such freedom about bodily waste. But hey, it’s a concern. […]
Everyone thinks our dog, Tia is a pit bull. And I guess she could be a pit bull, but we don’t know for sure. The Rescue said she was an American Staffordshire Terrier, which looks like this: A pit bull looks like this: Tia looks like this: Hence the confusion. We haven’t mistreated her (besides occasionally going too many days without a walk), or trained her to fight. She’s been with us since she was three months old. She’s the sweetest dog you could ever meet. She is perfectly patient and easy-going when it comes to wee ones. The problem with Tia is that she does look like a pit bull and sometimes she lives up to her name when it comes to other four-legged creatures. Like yesterday when Ryan and Miles took her to the park. Dad and son were happily hitting golf balls while Tia was attached to a pole on […]
What a difference a year can make! We spent some time out in the backyard today. Or the “back ard,” as Miles calls it. I couldn’t believe how different Miles is from my memory of hanging out back there last time it was warm enough to do so. Last year Miles was just saying tiny little phrases. This year he’s telling stories and expressing his feelings. He said things like “I’m glad we came outside.” And “That was fun to swing.” Then he golfed and golfed. We knew last year that he was pretty coordinated for his age. We put a club in his hands this year and were shocked at his ability! He had an adult right-handed club (he swings with his left) and he could still smack the ball! It was so much fun to watch.Then we came in the house for dinner. Miles said, “tell me up a story, daddy.” […]
Here you go Mackenzie and Caleb! Look at this! Can you believe it’s been three years? Here is the first installment of photos for the wedding video… I mean… for fun! (I suggest choosing a fun song from the right-hand side under “Hear This” while you watch…just an entertainment suggestion…) Thank you for allowing me to pop up in your inbox and for reading my words, silly or serious. I appreciate you. ~Heather
You don’t have to be nice and good all the time to be unconditionally loved. Toddlers know this best. Miles: “O! That’s for Olivia!” Mommy: “That’s right! O is for Olivia!” Miles: “Yeah, Olivia…my love.” Mommy: “Your love?” Miles: “Yeah, she’s kinda good to me.” Thank you for allowing me to pop up in your inbox and for reading my words, silly or serious. I appreciate you. ~Heather
Something that is pretty important to me in parenting is averting my children’s attention from media and commercialism. I recognize what an extreme effect our American culture has had on my own mind. As a parent, I have to face how even more extreme it is today. The impact of the messages that we are fed is pretty incredible, subconscious or not. I was happy to hear someone speak on this earlier today and wanted to share some things that were shared with me. First of all, the average child spends 44 hours a week in front of the TV, video games, and/or computer. The average child spends 3 hours per week in one-on-one meaningful contact with a parent. I recognize now some very negative messages I was fed my entire life that I had no idea were having an effect on me. I thought myself immune to the barrage of messages feeding […]
It’s not so much the presence of snow and cold that get me. It’s more about the absence of sun, green grass and leaves, flowers, and that new smell in the air. If this nasty weather continues, you can find me on the fifth floor at Regions hospital, sitting with the unspeller (click on original post) and other folks, hallucinating and talking to myself. Thank you for allowing me to pop up in your inbox and for reading my words, silly or serious. I appreciate you. ~Heather
Miles is getting more and more creative with excuses at bedtime. It started with needing water, hugs and more prayers. But now that we’re on to him, knowing he’s not dehydrated or affection deprived, he’s upping the ante. He’ll drop his “guggy” (snuggly little blanket) over his bed rail and call out, saying that he can’t get it. He’ll yell that his tummy hurts. He’ll say that he’s scared (that one worked really well for awhile, by the way). Then we started to get more strict, hoping the return visits to his room wouldn’t get too out of hand. He stopped coming up with the usual requests, realizing we weren’t going to give in, and has started to get creative. Like today at naptime when I said, “night night” and closed the door, only to hear, “MOOOOM, there’s WAX coming out my EEEAAARR!!,” over and over. Um, okay. He just kept it up […]
Ryan calls me “Colombo” pretty frequently because I notice everything. I even notice small unimportant things. Let me tell you, I sure can fill my brain with a whole lot of meaningless information. All it really does for me is send my brain into over-drive.For example, I notice exactly how things are arranged on say… end tables. Then the next time I’m in the same place, I notice if something is missing or askew and I fight the urge to slightly move the item. I guess my nickname should be “Monk.” It’s not that I’m scrutinizing or judging these things, it just simply happens without me making an effort. It comes naturally to store these pictures in my mind. Now don’t go thinking I have a photographic memory, cause that’s not it. I don’t really know what it is. I just take things in.Another example: I know if Ryan had more than his […]
Trying to get the photo: And this was the best I could do when trying to get these two wigglers to pose. This is actually one of my favorites because it shows their personalities so much. We’ve got the sweetest boys. To know them is to love them! Asher’s favorite form of transportation (and I actually love it too): But he is pretty heavy: If you’re saying “what IS that thing?” it’s a Moby D baby sling and it’s the BOMB. Thank you for allowing me to pop up in your inbox and for reading my words, silly or serious. I appreciate you. ~Heather
I never really wanted to take my kids to the mall play area. But now I get it. It’s desperation that does it to a mom. When all you want is for the temps to stay above 40 so you can hang outside, and then it snows again…you go to the mall whether you like it or not. Just to get out and have your kids get good and tired so they’ll nap well. I would like to share what you always find at the play place at the mall (besides a bazillion germs). Stereotypical or not, it’s the truth…The Parents:The Hovering Over-protector – there’s always at least one. I used to be her.The Competitor – usually many more than one (“oooh, he’s been crawling for months…”)The Grumpy Grandma – today, we met a doozy. Mackenzie got in trouble for having Ellorie with her in the play area. I guess she’s too young […]
Grandma, Dad, Asher, Birthday Girl-Shelly, and Zach Miles and MaxZach and Max There is something I just LOVE about this picture. I don’t even know what it is, I just love it. My sister had a birthday today and Miles, Asher and I were able to go spend part of the day with her and her family. We met Grandma and Dad at Dave and Shelly’s. It was good to see everyone. Miles is so crazy about his cousins, it’s always good for him to get his dose of them. Family is such a good thing. I can see an understanding of what family means unfolding in Miles. Maybe an understanding that they’ll always be there and that his cousins are forever friends. An understanding that people like Nanny and Bapa and his Aunts and Uncles are connected to him in a special way. He’s just starting to understand how his grandparents are […]
Today is one of those days that just feels good. First of all, the weather! Oh, what a relief. Monday we had a blizzard and today I watched a convertible drive by with it’s top down. Crazy Minnesotan! But I totally get it. If I had a convertible, my top would be down too!I watched “Ellen” this morning too, which is always a special treat for me. I don’t turn on regular TV with the kids around (call me crazy but I hate it when they see commercials). But anyway, Miles was at school and Asher was asleep so I got to catch some of the show. There was a guy on that recently boated across the Atlantic. Now, that’s no big deal if you’re on a ship or a boat with a motor, but we’re talkin’ ROW boat. I’m sure many people think the dude is a total nutcase. But me? I […]
The Thigh Guy When Mommy Walks AwayA Winter Walk Thank you for allowing me to pop up in your inbox and for reading my words, silly or serious. I appreciate you. ~Heather
Some things to remember about 2yr. old Miles and 8mo. old Asher:Lately Miles thinks it’s really cool to say “poopy” – REALLY cool. Asher has started to talk!!! He says “ball” a lot. – his first and favorite word.Miles is totally into giants, superheros and the like and can imagine anything.We are out and about nearly every weekday morning, and home most afternoons.Both boys nap at around 12:30 or 1:00pm, leaving me a good half hour of “free time.” Miles still has the BEST sense of humor, cracking little jokes and understanding ours. Asher laughs hysterically at throwing stuff (snow off the shovel or a ball are his favs).Both boys are SUPER ticklish, all over, all the time.Miles currently LOVES to “help” do dishes. We go with it and clean the floor later.Miles is still SO into cars and tools. He helps daddy downstairs and in the garage.On Tuesdays and Thursdays when Miles […]
