Ode to Ryno

Some time ago I published a post (sounds fancy) called “15 Reasons.” Then I went on and on about the great things my husband does/is. I should do that more often. Because then he’d have an ego boost after I scold him for leaving hats on the counter all the time and having too many newspapers and driving too close to the car in front of him and not cleaning up the breakfast dishes and stepping over piles of laundry rather than picking them up….
Poor guy.

Just now I was thinking that he’s pretty great. Not just quirky and funny, but great. For example, this morning was a bit rough on the Miles front. We were sending him to his room to start the day over about fifty times (okay, that’s an exaggeration but I’m painting a picture here). Some days are like that, he really does “wake up on the wrong side of the bed.” It’s pretty much one way or the other each day. Black or white. Hot or cold. Rude or nice….Three is…a lot.

So anyway, Ryan and I tried to do things like have a conversation, drink coffee and peek at the paper, but it just wasn’t happening. Instead we were saying things like, “hey, don’t step on your brother. Don’t do that! Miles? NO, no no no no no no….” I’ve talked a lot with Ryan lately about how we need to be careful about what we focus on with this child. Or any child really. Since you get what you focus on. So we’ve been very careful to praise often and not freak too much. I can see how a kid could get a complex in this stage of childhood since they really are doing something “wrong” most of the time. Out of curiosity, mischievousness, or temptation. Being human. They just haven’t figured out that they might chop their fingers off or crack their head open yet, so it’s tricky. But I digress…

This particular Memorial Day morning was off to a bad start. I was reacting in ways I try not to react and Ryan was mostly trying to read the paper and feed Asher. And then he interrupted another “scuffle” between Miles and I to say, “who wants to go outside? Should we go on an adventure?” To which Miles, relieved and excited took him up on the graceful offer. This might not seem like a big deal, but in toddler world, it really is. Because that’s what parents need to do. Sacrifice their own needs and time to distract and entertain. To be present and spend quality time. And Ryan is so good at that. He does what a lot of dads don’t do and gladly, selflessly offers his time with no nagging prompts from me.

So Asher was able to take a peaceful morning nap and I was able to catch up on some laundry without turning into psycho mommy. These little moments really do mean the world to me. And to Miles. One day, when Miles is all tall and scruffy-faced, smiling at me and being all grown-up and everything, I will see all of his kindness, selflessness, and joyful zest for life and I’ll give the credit to dad.