Posted on Wednesday~January 14th, 2009
If you’ve been around here long, you know I do things to embarrass myself quite frequently. Like that time I bonked heads with a man right after our cars collided in a parking lot. Yeah. Like that.
But sometimes life just makes a fool of you, taking the lead in making itself interesting, just in case you don’t do it enough yourself. (TM, you’re going to love this.)
I was talking to my brother-in-law (notice how I didn’t type BIL? I don’t know why I resist the acronyms. I just do.)
Anyway, Uncle K had stopped by mid day to pick something up. It was nap time, so we were allowed the luxury of finishing sentences. We talked at length about family dynamics, where we are in life, and pretty much solved the world’s problems.
As we were waxing philosophical, me sitting sprawled across the coach with my laptop balancing on my legs, Uncle K (my husband’s twin by the way) stopped talking mid-sentence, looking toward the dog in confusion. Said dog was around the corner from where I was sitting….near the laundry room…oh no….
Our very in-depth conversation was completely over when Uncle K then asked something I knew would bring me humiliation,
“What does she have?”
To which I responded (like a big lazy sloth),
“Um. I don’t know. I can’t see from here.” (WHY didn’t I just get up to investigate myself??? Poor, poor Uncle K…)
My very kind brother-in-law, beloved Uncle K, then carefully took a step closer to the dog, looking a bit unsure of how to proceed…
While he bent down and reached for the dog’s new chew toy he said,”Oh noooo, TIA! What are you doing?” (His fears and mine were confirmed.)
And then he (ever so carefully and from their very edge) lifted my pink undies with the green laced-in bows away from the dog, carrying them off to the laundry room with a look of horror on his face.
Um…Thanks Uncle K. This is great. I never dreamed you would have to touch my dirty underwear, but I thank you for taking care of business, scolding my dog, and returning my unmentionables to the wash pile. That’s super. This is waaay awkward. And gross. Please come back soon. We’ll talk about religion and politics. After that, you can wear one of my bras on your head. You’re welcome.
Note to self: Keep the laundry room door closed, especially when company comes.
{ 51 comments }
That dog is way too smart for your own good. FUNNY!
I just laughed, and laughed, and laughed. . . Sorry for your embarrassment. At least it wasn’t a used pad or something. Though, underwear plays a close second. Especially dirty underwear. Hee, hee, hee. I am still laughing.
oh, poor Heather! Is he married? Seriously embarrassing. Made for a good post though!
Oh dear! Oh me! Oh my! The whole twin thing, too (I have an identical twin)–my brother in law (also resisting) cares so much more than what I think than the rest of the sisters for that reason. But, if the bra thing happens, I want pictures.
Crying. Crying here. Laughing uncontrollably, with tears streaming down my face. At first I thought it was an… umm… sanitary napkin (you know, because of my momma’s cat). But then…
Still laughing.
Next time you need to let him see you in them. Because then I will feel completely better! :)
Lol. This is embarressing. It has only happened once to me. at a friends house, on a sleep over party. Mine were the only ones the dog shredded…does that mean I my stink was better then the other girls? Does it mean she didn’t like the others? I’m confused. Not that I WANT a dog to like me so much it shreds my ‘wear…
Oh, man though the Bro-in law…that’s, yeah…that’s a bad one Heath. I’m blushing for you just reading it.
Is it terrible of me that I’m laughing hysterically?
Oh that sounds so like something that would happen to me.
My mother, in her 80s, has always told me the old supersitition, “If you bump heads with someone, you’re going to sleep with him/her tonight.” They meant that in a purely innocent way back in the 30s and 40s, but today, there’s no escaping the humor in that. I’m confident that the head bumping did not weave a magic upon you that made you lose your inhibitions!
This is why I don’t wear underwear.
HAHAHAHAHA!! That is freaking HILARIOUS!!
Amen Kristina!!
lol I have SO been there.
Bahahaha! That’s WAY too funny! Thanks for that, needed a laugh this morning :)
Holy crap that is funny. Thanks for giving me my first laugh of the day.
That’s hilarious. Thanks for entertaining us with your embarrassing moments. . .
(Having removed a couple of my own posts for the judgment reasons, I completely understand, even though I didn’t read it. I hope I wasn’t the person who posted the original post.)
Oh dear! I am laughing so hard that I have gone into a spastic coughing fit.
So funny. I had a complete visual of it.
LOL..now that is hillarious!
I wish I weren’t at work so I could laugh really loud. LOL Moments like these are GREAT for stories about five years down the road!
At least they weren’t stained granny pants?
poor uncle K…I do really hope that bra thing happens, if so, will you invite us over to spy?
You know he’s jealous.
And your husband is proud.
WHY OH WHY do dogs like underwear? I am CONSTANTLY fighting this one with my Maggie. Ugh. It’s disgusting. And embarrassing.
But I have to say, I’m pretty proud about your pink and green panties. Like Kate Coveny Hood said, at least they weren’t stained granny panties. LOL!!
That is hilarious and really made me laugh! What a great way to get through the day!
If our kids aren’t embarrassing us, the dog IS!
At least they weren’t your granny panties ;)
I could not stop laughing when I read this! And I finally got a minute to catch up on your last several posts and it felt like catching up wit an old friend. You are such a great writer, and sweet too, the best combination. Love your blog.
I am so sorry but that is the kind of story that people will talk about forever. Luckily, you will probably be laughing when you retell it too.
Oh, my. Its true…no good can come of company getting involved in laundry…clean or otherwise.
Stories for posterity!
AWESOME.
Sometimes you wonder why you get out of bed in the morning eh?
that is hilarious and I am LOL!!! Actually, I can’t stop laughing!!
kind of like when your son finds you tampons and takes the moment when company is over to bring them out and ask what they are!! niiiiiice
That is too funny! The lazy factor always gets me into trouble too. ;)
I resist acronyms too and don’t know why either.
Oh, the good ol’ dog and underwear combo.
I won’t even tell you what my dog dragged out of the master bath once when we had friends over to play games. ugh…
Very funny!
And to think all that happened when you were ‘sprawled across the coach’ – lucky coach!
BB x
Funny Funny Funny.
Oh, that is classic!
hey, my dog once hauled a used tampon out of the trash bin into the dining room whilst we were entertaining.
Okay that is funny. If it makes you feel any better, when we were newly married and staying with my in-laws, their dog come out to the living room with a condom she fished out of the trashcan. Mark’s parents and grandparents got to witness that. Um, awkward!!
At least you had cute underwear. If this had happened to me, the dog would have dragged out size XXL grandma underwear and I’ve have to *pretend* like it wasn’t mine and “oh my, I wonder where that came from! Must be the previous owners….”
That is hilarious! I love dogs, but they can be so gross! At least it wasn’t anything worse!
I found your “follow” button! Hooray! Thanks for your sweet comment on James’ blog. I do that all the time, wonder why I don’t see posts from someone then realize that I didn’t click, or that they don’t do “followers” and I forget to add them manually.
That is one nice thing about cats. They leave your undies alone.
So sorry. (but still amused)
OMG, nice!! I get embarrassed about that with no company over… LOL
:)
~Tabitha~
freshmommyblog.com
My friend got a puppy from the pound that grew into a GIANT…something…sort of Rottweiler-ish. Anyway, it steals her panties and then poops them out in the yard. So at least your unmentionables aren’t that dirty. I hope?
Oh my word! Heee hee
And this is when the acronym ROTFLMAO seems to JUST fit! Hilarious, Heather of the EO.
And…I love the look of your blog, girl!
One word comes to mind after reading this post…super! You clearly have married into a family with very strong bonds. A man with no fear of touching his SIL’s underwear is one in a million.
Oh wait, I mean, sister-in-law’s underwear. :)
-Francesca
Hahaha! My dog has an underwear fetish too! I find stray pairs out in the living room all the time. Fortunately, though, none of them are mine, and the finder is not my uncle. You are hilarious.
WOW! Great blogging material!~
Very funny! (And that’s what you’re here for isn’t it? To entertain us?)
I know I’m in for some embarassing episodes soon. My son has recently become obsessed with tampons (unused thank God!), to the horror of his father.
And that is precisely why I don’t wear panties. I can’t imagine how my brother-in-law would react if our dog came out with panties in his mouth and they were mine.
With our first child, we did cloth diapers. Our dog at the time, somehow got her paws on one that had been pooped in. Much to our delight, we discovered that she had chewed a hole through it. EEW!!!
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