Posted on Monday~January 12th, 2009
If I had a quarter for every time someone said, “Now you should go take a nap,” after my boys are down, I’d be extremely wealthy. It’s not a bad suggestion. When I’ve struggled my way through half of a day that begins between 5 and 6 a.m., it would be refreshing to snooze a few minutes while my boys nap. It’s a very good idea.
It makes a whole lot of sense that the people in my life would make this napping suggestion. They are the ones that have had to listen as I’ve gone on and on and on and on…and on about my sleep deprivation.
I like the idea of napping. I just can’t do it.
My husband could fall asleep on a donkey. Imagine it. A small donkey with a grown man slumped over it’s neck, feet dragging along the ground. That would be Ryan. He would sleep so soundly, he’d be snoring and twitching, drooling all over the poor little hee-haw.
Just now, he slid off the couch and on to our living room floor (which is freezing, by the way). He curled up to spoon the stinky dog and asked for a throw pillow. Two seconds later he’s fast asleep.
I’m so jealous.
I haven’t napped since…well, according to my mother, never. No, not even as a baby. I guess a busy brain is something you’re born with. I don’t even sleep well at night. No matter how sleep deprived I am, or how interested I am in a current dream I’m having, the slightest sounds will wake me up and then, well…I’m up. I’m tossing and turning and cursing the day I was born.
After Asher was born, people started saying things like, “Well, now that you have TWO kids, you WILL learn to nap.” Imagine if it really was no choice. TWO kids and BAM, I’m able to nap. I can see it, picture it with me…
I walk out of Miles’ room after tucking him in for a nap. As my hand leaves the door knob, I simply cannot take one step further so I just slump to the floor, rolling myself up in the hall rug and falling fast asleep. I stay there until “Mommy, I’m up now!” pierces my dreams. I wipe the sleep from my eyes and begin the second half of the day anew.
Yes, I feel that tired sometimes. But no, I have not found that I WILL nap now that I have TWO kids.
I’m not normal. These suggestions are normal. I am not.
So I have learned to simply respond with something along the lines of, “mmhmmm…yeeeaaaah,” while pursing my lips and gritting my teeth. Then the innocent advice-giver looks at me like I have a horn on my head, or maybe like I need a nap.
If anyone has the miracle cure, some sort of potion that makes one a sound sleeper, please send it my way. I would welcome a chance to experience sleep coming quickly, and staying a little longer. I would also like to be able to answer sleep suggestions with a hearty, “Why yes! I think I WILL go nap. Because I CAN! Thank you for the idea.”
(Yes, all the sarcasm is a result of sleep deprivation. But I can’t help it. I CAN’T NAP.)
*photo courtesy of flickr. She’s not me.
{ 44 comments }
melatonin .. (hope the spelling is correct) .. what your body produces to aid sleep .. you can buy it over the counter .. it is not a sleeping pill .. it just assists ..
I am one of the sleepers .. i can go to sleep in the middle of a conversation .. while I am talking
I try to nap, but it doesn’t work for me either. However, chamomile with valerian works wonders! :)
I wouldn’t be able to take something to help me nap because I would be afraid my kids would need me and I wouldn’t be able to wake up. I didn’t nap when they were preschoolers for that very reason. I nap now. All the time. I may be napping as I type this. Hard to tell at times.
I could propose a concoction, but then you’d be blogging, “How do I wake up?” :-)
#4! I’m totally slacking!
And I love napping. I live for Sunday naps.
I’m napping-deficient as well. If only there was an off switch for the brain…
The donkey ride visual? Excellent! I can totally picture Adam doing the same thing. He can sleep anywhere, anytime.
It’s why I get bed rage.
Oh honey!
Have you ever tried taking some magnesium or a “calm” formula of vits/minerals/herbs? (I think the calm stuff is something you drink or mix into water.)
Our house could crumble during an earthquake and I’d still be sleeping. I’m one of those people…
I try to nap too but every (and I mean every) litle noise captures my attention and then I am afraid that someone is breaking into my house (i have morbid thoughts I know–been that way all my life). Napping doesn’t work for me either.
And my husband and your husband must be brothers seperated at birth because he is the SAME way!!
Sounds like it is not the need for sleep that is the issue, but the ever-going mind that is hindering your sleep. Have you tried meditating during the boys’ naps? It may sound a bit hokey, but imagine if you could rid your mind of the “to-do” list for a few minutes…maybe sleep would be just around the corner. :-)
I don’t nap either. . .ever–unless I’m sick–which is rare–and my two kids are rarely asleep at the same time anyway. I even have a difficult time putting myself to bed at 9:00pm when they are both sometimes usually in bed for the night. I am always tired. I suggest Diet Mt. Dew to help lift your spirits and energy level! haha!
It took six kids before I could nap. Now I can do it on the livingroom floor, a Disney flick blaring from the TV and my son’s stereo blasting upstairs.
The irony of this suggestion is not lost on me:)
I LOVE me a good nap. I feel bad for those who can’t nap. It makes me so much nicer when I actually get one (which really isn’t often).
What a bummer! Yuck! I'm so sorry . . .often people have an adrenaline rush when they lie down to nap & then that's the end of it. I wonder. . . anyway, what I hated were all the suggestions of things I could do whilst the kiddio napped (mine are so spread apart, I only had one napper at a time). Napping was one of them, so was housework, writing, crafting, whatever it was I complained about not finding time for, the solution was "do it whilst the kiddio naps" until one time I just screamed and said "I can't do EVERYthing while the kiddio naps!! He does only sleep for 45 minutes, after all!" (or however long it was). Being the mom of a special needs child, I have recieved lots of well intentioned but utterly uninformed advice. Drove. Me. Nuts. These people had no idea what they were talking about. None. Whatsoever. Maybe that's why I grind my teeth when I sleep. Hey, THAT's something you can do while you nap . . .
I have always had this complex about free time being at a premium (even before I had kids) and hate the idea of wasting one second of it on sleep. I’d like to be conscious for all of my me-time.
That said, I do take a weekend nap once in a while when I’m just exhausted and the stars have aligned and the twins are napping and Oliver is happy to hang out with his father and not require my presence (rare). The problem with this is that I wake up feeling like I’d rather keep sleeping for the rest of my life. In short – I don’t nap because I really don’t like to wake up. At least not after just an hour or two.
I am sure there are plenty of people out there who wish they weren’t needing a nap all the time. Maybe there are people who find that their naps are ruining their lives. They never accomplish anything, they always have bed head, etc. Maybe YOU are the lucky one! m a y b e
I don't nap, either. It's because I have a hard time waking up, and I end up feeling even more groggy & grumpy than I was to begin with.
I always laughed when people said, “nap when your child naps” when they are newborns because I knew there was no WAY I could.
The image of your husband on a donkey made me laugh!
My mother, when she wasn’t teaching, would take a nap after lunch every day as long as I can remember. Not the kids–we were assigned to clean up the kitchen, and if we woke her up arguing about it we were in BIG trouble. I suspect half the time she was just reading with the door closed, but she really protected that time.
Now, I really admire that about my mom, because I can’t do it either. I just get grumpy. Maybe we should just go to our rooms and lock the door. But my kids know how to pop it open with a paper clip.
Hmm. . . maybe there is something to those stricter parenting styles.
You’re so funny! I am right with you on the no napping thing. “Sleep when they’re sleeping” YEAH RIGHT! I get insanely jealous of my husband’s ability to fall asleep within seconds. I would love to nap, or sleep in, but I don’t imagine that happening unless I’m dying or on heavy medication;)
Oh, I am so sorry, Heather. I understood about the sleep deprivation as you have two small boys one of them being a very small boy in constant discomfort, but I never realized that you DIDN’T SLEEP DURING THE DAY!! I would die. I’m very sorry.
I am not a napper either. I never napped as a child either. I went to daycare and always, as in every single day, got introuble at naptime for not napping. One day I was sick and napped. I got the “super sleeper” award that they made up just to reward me and hope I might nap again. I did not.
So, in theory, napping is good. I just happen not to be able to do it either.
I don’t need to nap. Honestly, when I DO fall asleep in the day, it screws me up so badly at night that it’s not worth it. But I would really REALLY love to be able to fall asleep and STAY asleep every night. I hate waking 4 hours into the night and realizing, “I’m up for the day.” Grreeeeat…..
An occasional Tylenol PM at night?
Or a dawn/dusk simulator might help–gradually (like over 20 minutes or so) turns the light off at night and on in the morning like our bodies expect light to be, the sun setting and rising again. I used one for years and it really helped GET to sleep and then to wake up in the morning.
Hubby won’t let me use it now, because I get up way before him and he doesn’t want the light waking him. The bum. :)
My husband can’t nap either — he was a terrible sleeper as a baby. My children are all destined to follow his path (and make me batty in the interim).
I just keep thinking that maybe when i die, I will get to take a nice long nap, for a bit before I have to start working again :)
I was afraid to take something and miss hearing my kids too, but I found that getting back into my pajamas really helped. If I don’t get dressed in the morning, I don’t feel productive, but changing again has made my body say, Oh its sleeping time again! I also found that unless the room is dark I have a terrible time napping; once I changed my drapes it was smooth sailing.
Change, have a cup of tea, put on some white noise and if you still can’t sleep I do suggest laying down, even with a book while your kiddos nap; its good for Everyone to have some quiet time, LOL. Good Luck!
Blessings,
Carolynn
Fellow insomniac, here. I do, however, on rare occasion drink some Sleepytime Tea. It’s an herbal tea that makes me feel like I’m drugged enough to have surgery. I don’t know if it would work for you, but you did ask for suggestions.
And… have you had your thyroid checked?
Well I have to opposit issue, I CAN nap and do it too much I CAN’T fall asleep at night in a timely (3 hours later) fashion.
I have found one thing that usually works for me. I think about my day and I find something I can visualize that is so completely boring that to prevent myself from dieing I got into survival mode and sleep. I repeat the image in my mind over and over and over something like putting a plate in the dishwasher.
Also mint tea, a hot bath and 40 minutes of reading or simple puzzle games.
I have always been able to fall asleep at anytime, anyplace.
However, lately I have been noticing that I am on the verge of falling asleep all day long but as soon as I get the kids in bed, I get a second wind.
I think all of this night shift work is finally catching up to me.
Do you get sleepy when you are not supposed to be sleepy? (meetings etc)
Yeah, I’m not a big napper, either. I get so disoriented when I wake up. But I do agree with “them” that it’s a good idea. If you can stomach it.
That’s awesome you don’t have to nap…think of it as a gift!
Seriously, When my kids were little I had to! If not I was intolerable by eve!
Nap is Pan spelled backwards. I say cook something instead.
naps? whats a nap?
I’ve never been much of a napper, either, even as a child. I have two kids, also (one is four and the other is eighteen months). Usually, I don’t *want* to nap; if they’re sleeping, that’s Mommy’s time to do something FUN! Napping is not that exciting, frankly, when I could be pursuing some hobby of mine.
The only thing that gets me to drift off in the middle of the day is (occasionally) a book. I’ve gotta be at least on the couch, preferably on my bed, and when I feel myself getting drowsy, I let myself fall asleep … doesn’t happen terribly often, though.
Yah, I don’t nap either. Unless I’m sick. That’s a pretty sure sign that things aren’t going well.
Have you tried coffee?
(Kidding. I’m a napper, so I kid. It’s what I do.)
If I sit still for five minutes, I’m out. Anytime, anywhere. Regardless of how much sleep I’ve just gotten. I’m sorry you can’t get a nap. I wish I could package up my excess sleepy and send it over to you.
Oh man, all that Asher’s surgery stuff, and the dark days, but THIS… this is where I hurt for you the most! No naps? I couldn’t live without them. Well, actually I almost never get them, but wishing for them is what keeps me alive sometimes, just knowing that maybe I can take a nap soon. Have you even laid down WITH them for a nap? Sometimes I go out before they do and then I’m reassured that I’ll wake when they get up and move around.
I can nap like a champ!!! I love me some naps!!!
I can literally fall asleep anytime if given some peace and quiet!
The thing that prevents me from napping is the guilt. I lay there thinking about all the other things I should be doing. If it weren’t for that one thing, I could easily nap daily. Need me an anti-guilt sleep mask!
I have tried taking a couple of naps when they do on the weekends, and was successful, HOWEVER…the result is that I wake up even more tired than if I hadn’t done it at all. And that’s probably because 2 hours wasn’t enough, so your body is better off just skipping it and drinking something terrible for you like coca-cola. :) Yum.
I have no problem taking naps. Sometimes I call it my Survival Sleep. My hubby often works until 2 or 3 am. And sometimes he works through the entire night. I usually try to wait up for him. (Even though I rarely last until he gets home.)And then I make up for it with a catnap while the kids are at school. It keeps me healthy and sane. (Well, sort of.) :)
Oh, and it requires no chemicals. Years and years of sleep deprivation eventually catch up with the best of us! :)
I understand! It’s HARD to nap… there’s always so much to do!!
:)
~Tabitha~
freshmommyblog.com
I don’t know what to say. I survive on naps. It’s the nighttime sleept that I can’t do.
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