stay right here

November 2, 2012

Yesterday I arrived in Chicago and stood on a curb, waiting for my much appreciated ride. (I’m here to speak at BBC Chicago.) I texted my friend and let her know what vestibule I was standing by and she texted back,

stay right there.

It made me think of being in the now, you know? The way I have to say to myself, stay right here. Stay right here, over and over. Otherwise I’m always thinking ahead, what’s next, what needs to be done and how will it turn out? What can I do to control it?

Stay here now. 

After some buses moved, I could see that I was standing right in the middle of the rental car pick-up, and if I walked just about twenty steps, I’d be in the right place for a car to pick me up. I had picked the wrong place to stand and so I started to move toward the right place. Then I stopped. Oh yeah.

Stay right there. 

Sometimes even if the place we’re standing feels all wrong, we still need to just stay right there. Just let it go. Just be.

Instead of moving, I texted my friend again, I think I’m in the rental car pick up area. I might be blocked by buses. 

That’s all I could do, because if I moved from where she expected to find me, I could make things worse. Yeah, totally a metaphor and one that I have not lived out so many times before. I’m uncomfortable! I have to run! Let’s go! Move on! We can’t stay HERE! 

I get it now, even though it’s always going to be hard for a recovering controlling people pleaser perfectionist with martyr tendencies, like me…

Sometimes we have to stay in that uncomfortable place because it’s exactly where we’ll be found. 

My ride found me without any kind of problem at all and we were off, on the road again, moving on. Forward.

So often, you can’t go forward without being stuck in discomfort for a while first. So we have to stay there, just stay there, until we’re picked up.

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